Pilot complaints and problems

Actual maintenance complaints and problems submitted by pilots to maintenance engineers. After attending to the complaints and problems, maintenance crews are required to log the details of the action taken to solve the complaints and problems reported by the pilots.

Problems (P) reported by pilots and solutions (S) reported by mechanics are recorded in the Aircraft logbook.

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: No. 2 propeller seeping fluid.
S: No. 2 propeller seepage normal. Nos. 1, 3 and 4 propellers lack normal seepage.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That’s what they’re for.

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you’re right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Pilot’s seat cushion too hard.
S: Exchanged pilot and co-pilot seat cushions.

P: Unfamiliar noise coming from no. 2 engine.
S: Engine ran for four hours. Noise now familiar.

P: Whining sound heard on engine shutdown.
S: Pilot removed from aircraft.

P: Pilot’s clock inoperatice.
S: Wound clock.

P: No. 2 ADF (Automatic Direction Finder) needle runs wild.
S: Cought and tamed no. 2 ADF.

P: Three roaches in cabin.
S: One roach killed, one wounded, one got away.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

P: Weather radar acts like there is an ape inside.
S: Opened radar, let out ape, cleaned up mess.

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.